Monday, September 7, 2009-
10:43 PM
And today I finally understood the literal meaning of"putting a fullstop"Life is contradicting, ironic. The grass on the other side is always
greener. I counted, 63 more days till A Level and I'm still wasting every second of my time. Ought to slap myself. I promise this shall be the last post about -. I don't know whats going on inside my brain already. Its nothing got to do with my A's, its got to do with you. Cause only you could take this sadness away, only you could make my life the way it used to be. Maybe there's some things I don't understand but there is definitely certain things I fully understand. I thought I've moved on but I'd only realise I've been lying to myself all these years. Sometimes I wished I could just listen to my brain instead of my heart but my actions doesn't seem so. You promised and yet you broke it once again, not once but thrice. I feel so stupid believing you when I know in the end its just another false promise. I tried to hate you, I tried to forget you but I just can't. Your appearance, you appearing in front of me just made me fall in love you with you instantly, once again, like how I did the very first time we met. Why is this happening again? I know life still goes on and bla bla bla but its bitter inside. I was wondering why God put certain people in front of us whom He knows we'll get hurt in the end. Yes, its for a purpose, there's a reason but its just unbearable. No use stabbing the wound twice then thrice when its not even healed. This post seemed kind of useless because I never let it out, everything. Anyway I promised
TanLiTing I'll brave through these so I won't crumble now, A's is just 63 days away. Life messed up. Results screwed up. There's really nothing left of me. In fact, everything that I do reminds me of you zzz. Perhaps I'll never go into a relationship anymore cause eventually it would be so one-sided, like now. Getting irritated with this useless self, lets hope tomorrow will be a better day. If you're reading this, I'm not blaming you cause its just me, just me, its me who is still stuck, me who got nothing better to do. But on second thoughts, I doubt you'll come here anyway, you've got better things to do than to entertain these rubbish. I need my brother here to talk some sense into me but he's away for camp, for the first time, I miss him so much-.- To end off, Happy Birthday
BGYB. You're just too special and irreplaceable.
I still never want to let you go
Should have loved while it lasted
